Aboard Tevai, as my husband, Tim, and I moved into the quiet rhythm of motoring from lock to lock in the New York State Canal System, I felt my mood sinking. Somehow, the dank and gloomy lock walls seemed to reflect my situation, and they felt like a prison. "I've left it all," I groaned, picturing my tennis buddies slamming that little yellow ball at each other and laughing afterward in the bar. I imagined fun parties at the yacht club, with everyone dancing. I savored memories of heart-to-hearts with my best friend, Claire, over a bottle of wine. The farther away we got from home, the darker and gloomier the world seemed.